Saturday, 27 August 2011

Brace yourselves

Do you know how many a brace is? It's Two. Check the dictionary.

(Screencap is from the BBC Sport website)

Thursday, 4 August 2011

Water logic

So, there I was at the local swimming pool, signing our daughter up for classes, and I had to choose between "Happy" and "Starter". Well, I said, she's never had any lessons, but she's reasonably confident in the water. So then, I'm told, she should do the "Happy" classes. When I query this and suggest that perhaps she should do the beginners' class, I'm told that "Happy" is the beginners' class, and "Starter", er, isn't. I was a bit doubtful, but there on the wall was the evidence...

The future in the past

At the time of writing, it's early August 2011. At the time of our trip to Ikea it was also early August 2011. So, how to explain this notice painted on the cafeteria wall? Well, I suppose we're used to this kind of language from newspaper headlines, whose syntax involves removing bits of what we'd normally say, in order to express something in as few words as possible. Thus, in "Imhotep crowned king next Tuesday" - as in "Your new restaurant completed September 2011" - we're supposed to understand that the "will be" or "is to be" or "is going to be" or "should be" or even "is supposed to be" has been omitted to save space.

Thing is, Ikea darlings, your wall isn't a newspaper. So please write proper English on it that makes normal, everyday sense. Tack.